Take Care, Sara by Lindy Zart

Title : Take Care, Sara

Author : Lindy Zart
Genre : New Adult, Contemporary Romance
Rate : 5 beautiful-heart breaking stars
First post on Goodreads.

Read from June 14 to 19, 2013

Memories were like ghosts that never went away; always there to haunt…

Memories had a funny way of inducing scents and sometimes even sounds. The past never seemed to fully leave a room; just as memories kept one’s history alive as well.

Memories were like two different sides of a coin. You can not get rid of the bad memories, and only keep the good ones.
Because ... even the sweetest memories, (still) could kill you from inside… 

And…
This is what the story about…
The memories…
Not the ugliest or bad one...
But it’s the sweetest one…

And even if it’s “the sweetest memories” , it could broken someone lives into pieces…

And…that the reason why this book successfully consumed me and broke my heart into pieces too while am reading it…
It’s like reading “In The Stillness” and “The last Hour” at the same time, coz I keep picturing Carrie’s life “after Ray” in Sara’s story…
And it make me cry even more…

I love the way the author describe all those anguish feelings perfectly in this story.
I love the way she build readers emotions from the beginning...
I can feel all Sara's anguish, sadness and grief while am reading this book.
Each chapters always bring tears to my eyes.
Even the simple words like "blue", can make me shed a tear...
It's exhausting, but I "enjoying" it.

Never in my reading history, i want to quote words from a book that much.
I want to put all those beautiful quotes into my review if I could !

It's too MUCH !

WARNING!! Review possibly contains spoilers !!

It didn’t matter who you were or what you’d accomplished in life; none of that mattered when tragedy struck.
You had no pull; no power.
You had no choice.
There was nothing to gamble with; nothing to do to put the odds in your favor.
You were there and then you were gone, leaving those around you to realize how insignificant they all really were; leaving them to try to pick up the destroyed pieces.

No matter how many times Sara loved, she lost.
It was all leaving her, fading away, becoming lost as she lost everything that had ever meant anything to her; as she lost herself…

Sara lost almost all her beloved peoples in her life.
Her father…her mother…and…CoLe, the love of her life… 
Sara can not deal with her lost, and immersed into endless grief.

Sara had had to force air into her lungs when all she'd wanted to do was not breathe.
Breathing had hurt. Breathing had meant she'd lived...
It was like her body had wanted to stop living because it couldn't deal with the pain of losing...
It hurt whether she breathed or not.
And the one thing that stung the most was knowing...here she sat, without her love, still living...still breathing...

“Something always brings me back to you.
It never takes too long.
No matter what I say or do I'll still feel you here...”- Gravity by Sara Bareilles
 
Memories…

Sometimes it could hurt you more if you can’t cope with it…
And Sara…can not move on from her lost…
His words…
Keep playing in her mind…
Like a broken tape…


Sara love her husband with all her heart and soul.
And Cole…
He love Sara even more…

“I’ve never loved anyone like I love you, Sara. Never will. I want to be with you until I take my last breath, and even when I take my last breath, I want it to be next to you.”

“…even after I’m dead and gone and am nothing. My love will linger on. It’s that awesome, that strong, that real. Have no doubt of that, Sara…” 
And Cole keep his “promise”… 
He never “leave” her…


“He wouldn’t like seeing you like this,” a voice told her.
“Don’t cry, Sara."
“He wouldn’t want you to cry for him. It’s okay to be sad. It’s okay to hurt. But you still have to live. You have to go on, Sara.”
“I can’t go on without him. He’s supposed to be here, with me.”
“He is, Sara. He’ll always be with you.”

Sometimes, when she was really silent and still, she thought she could hear his deep laughter, hear his low voice. He always sounded far away and faint and Sara had to strain her ears to make out his words. But if she thought too hard about it, his voice disappeared, and she was left feeling empty, hollow.

“I used to hear a voice, but sometimes, now, it seems like it’s his voice.”

All those “voices”…Make her longing even more and hurt her at the same time…
“Killing” her…again…and again…
No matter how hard Sara struggling from her lost, she failed…
Cuz she don’t want to let him go…

That was the one thing that never changed: the world kept moving, even when a life stopped.

Time healed all wounds was the saying.
That saying was a lie.
Time made the wounds deepen; it made them grow.
It was her enemy and it was winning the battle against her soul.
Time was ruining her, dissolving her, destroying her.
It was all she had and everything she hated.
Time mocked her in vivid detail of that final moment.
It was all about time. And it was killing her...

"There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes and see you looking back…
If I had just one more day, I would tell you how much that
I've missed you since you've been away
It's so out of line to try to turn back time…”- Hurt by Christina Aguilera

His pale blue eyes…

She missed his eyes the most.The thought of them never being open again, the thought of never staring into them and getting lost in the blue ocean that was her husband’s eyes, it was heart wrenching.
Unbearable.

Sara can’t let go her husband, even it almost a year since Cole lay down in hospital bed…
Not dead…not even live…
Car accident had put him in brain dead…
Sara still hoping that someday her husband will awake…
Just to look into his eyes and see him looking back…
But seems…it never happen…

“There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
Sometimes I want to call you
but I know you won't be there…”- Hurt by Christina Aguilera

Sara had to find something to make her want to live.

"I had to find something that was bigger than the guilt and pain I carried around.”

She needs to be "fix"...

To be "free"...


“Set me free, leave me be.
I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity.
Here I am and I stand so tall, just the way I'm supposed to be.
But you're on to me and all over me.”- Gravity by Sara Bareilles



And there is Lincoln...
Cole’s brother…

“I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away…” - Hurt by Christina Aguilera

“Must be one of those days again, huh?”

 I love their one sided phone call routine…
It’s hurt each time Sara call Lincoln when she felt so down, just to hear Lincoln soothing voice.
It's sweet...yet heart wrenching.
Lincoln always ended their one side conversation with simply words, “Take care, Sara”And that simple words always bring tears to my eyes each time I read it.

“Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just want to hide 'cause it's you I miss
You know it's so hard to say goodbye when it comes to this..”- Hurt by Christina Aguilera

“He’s like my conscience, telling me what to do and say, what not to do and say. I feel him all around me. Sometimes…sometimes I even think he is me, inside of me, part of me."

It's NOT only Sara...
But Lincoln too...
Lincoln lost his brother, it's hurt...
But what makes him hurt even more is...Sara...
Seeing Sara grieving and broken like that, make him suffer...

“You know…every time that phone rings and no one talks and I know it’s you, I get this pressure in my chest. Every time I hang up that phone knowing you’re on the other end of it, that pressure builds until it just…aches, Sara. I worry about you. I worry about you a lot. Talk to me.” 

Make him feels miserable...


“You’re still living, Sara.” Sara took a shaky breath, her chest squeezing and squeezing until she thought it would explode. “Maybe I shouldn’t be.”

“You don’t get to die with him. I won’t let you.”

“I want you to be happy, Sara, and if you’re not happy, I can’t be,” he said simply. 

Lincoln wanted Sara out of her grief, and live ...
Lincoln wanted Sara to get up and continue to live ...
Lincoln wanted Sara to "see" that there are another "life", another future - after Cole's death.
Lincoln wanted Sara to see there's still a new hope ...
Another "reason" to live...
Lincoln wanted Sara to see it...
To "see" him ...

Can Sara finally "see" him ?
Will She be able to out from her grief ?
Can She find her happiness ?

Can these two broken people heal each other pain ?
Who was saving whom? Maybe they were saving each other ?

Well, I suggest you to read the rest of this beautiful story by yourself...

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED !!!

Wish someday there's a movie made based on this beautiful book.

My playlist while am reading this book :
Hurt by Christina Aguilera
Gravity by Sara Bareilles  

About The Author

 

Lindy Zart is a USA TODAY bestselling author that has been writing since she was a child. Luckily for readers, her writing has improved since then. She lives in Wisconsin with her husband, two sons, and one cat. Lindy loves hearing from people who enjoy her work. She also has a completely natural obsession with wine, coffee, peanut butter, bloody marys, and pizza. 

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